This was found in my current sketchbook about my views at what i was working on. I currently and perhaps will not be working on it. from what i wrote...and knowingly...not working on it is good. Note to self and everyone...design film sounds good but you dont learn and a lot of the things they do are horrible...treat people with no ethics. i just want to learn and do design and not only do 3d model in a so-call design firm. that was not what a designer do and be train to do.

here is what i wrote:

The scale of project such as 19th street is at times overwhelming. it doesn't allow explanation of materials and methods. sometimes i question myself what kind of designer I am? wht do i like things? why do i like smaller, well constructed, well thought out things. maybe it's the fact that i enjoy short stories. a story that i can enjoy and easily comprehend in one sitting...and can also find the depth with the repeat readings. i'm not disliking novels and epics...those are not the things i am fascinated with. I think that also have to do with the fact that when i design, i think about how "I" would build it...not how a contractor would build it. am i an architect that wants to be a builder or a builder that wants to be an architect?